i have nothing more to say on the topic

its done

if you want it that way

i'll respect you descision.

you're right

nothing can take away the guilt

eventually it will fade like other things

but im only afraid that it wont.

i know you're probably got good reasons

much better reasons than anyone else would

and im so happy that you at least make the effort.

dont worry.

i wont bother you any longer.

i think i have mostly abandoned this blog for tumblr :/

but i dont put personal stuff there so this is still a nice place to put my thoughts (:

i guess? lol.

school's been tough. i feel so behind.

i hate it.

i wish that things were better.

i wish everything was better.

life moves on.

listen to your own words amelia.

dont do anything stupid.

like stay on the computer for hours when you're suppose to be doing homework.

im sorry, i had to stop it

last night was probably the worse night ever existed.

for the first time in my life i cried myself to sleep

life is unfair, if only i were so lucky as to not be involved

its my fault that you dont understand right?

okay yeah. fine. treat her better cause i dont deserve it right?

that's what they all say

i dont understand it and will i ever be able to understand the concept of it?

i fear that the most

i fear that because i dont understand it, i might make the worst mistakes of my life

i pray that what i read, hear about and see in shows doenst happen in real life

it might just be too hard to handle

you know something, i dont know how to help you

if you dont help yourself

am i right?

yeah im right.

you did everything to try and not sit next to me today

if you didnt realise i was trying so hard not to laugh the entire time

this is just funny bcos come on, have you not seen jacob's body

i could really use a wish right now.

crap :/

i've got bronchitis now. i coughing like some crazy TB patient

Mrs chan even sent me home from tuition cause it got so bad.

i threw up in her toilet. i feel damn bad D:

mum wont even let me go to school. arghhhhhh

she says i'll distract everyone with the coughing and i wont even pay attention bcos i'll keep

running back and forth to the toilet cause i'll have to recover myself

wtheck man.

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

im going to fall behind and not be able to catch up

i. am. going. to. die.

INEEDHELP

HOWDIDIGETINTOTHISSTATE????????????

i knew it.

once you saw my name, you logged off.

well, either that or you blocked me.

i have one word for you

COWARD

being sick really is a death wish.
i cant breathe through my nose due to the tre disgusting nonsense in my nose,
thus leaving me with no choice but to breathe through my mouth
and leaving me coughing every ten seconds and because its so uncofortable,
i'll continue having this coughing fit for a while and eventually end up puking what i just ate.
oh the joys of having the flu bug (:


p.s im cold ALL the time :/

THIS IS SO CUTE (:

PUSH EDWARD AWAYYYYYY

:D

THE COOLEST CUPCAKE ON PLANET EARTH

I ALREADY HAVE A LIFE (:

I WANT! PLEASE, BE AN ANGEL AND GIVE IT TO ME (:

SHE'S SO PRETTY HERE!

YEAH MATH GO AWAY

LOVE HERRRRR

im sorry but i could resist :P

today, you told me a such an important secret that.
it meant so much to me that we are now actually close enough you would tell me
but you wouldnt say more than that
i caressed it close to me, even though it was just a little inside to your world.
i smiled and said so why are you telling me?
but your reply just crumbled everything
and then you continued and said even if i werent there you still had your habit
please be kidding, please be trying to play tricks with me and scare me because im telling you,
its working.
dont go back, please please please dont go back to it,
i beg of you, i did so much to get you to stop
you dont know how much it put me through everytime i saw you do that
no more, please.
please?
im afraid that this time, the reason just my push you off the edge

THIS MADE ME LAUGH LIKE SHIT(:

IM JEALOUS OF JOEY KING D: AND SELENA GOMEZ IS SITTING ON HIS LAP OMGGGG

SO TRUE

WHAT I WOULD GIVE FOR THIS (:

I KNOW THE FEELING

HELLO (: IM WATCHING ECLIPSE TMR AND IM EXCITED TILL I WANT TO SCREAM MY LUNGS OUT! HEEHEEEHEE. OH THE WEDDING WAS AWESOME YESTERDAY THOUGH I DIDNT GET TO EAT MUCH AND THE FACT THAT I WAS STANDING ABOUT 90% OF THE TIME (: TEEHEE. KEPT HAVING MINI HEART ATTACKS THANKS TO PEOPLE NOT GIVING RIGHT SIGNALS AND SAYING RETARDED THINGS INTO THE WALKIE TALKIE. BUT I FELT SO PROFESSIONAL HAVING ONE OF MY OWN :D HEEHEE ANYWAY CONGRATS SHAWN AND TANTY YOU GUYS WERE JUST MADE FOR EACH OTHER AND THE WEDDING WAS PURE MAGIC, YOU'RE LOVE FOR EACH OTHER MAKES ME SMILE AND I HOPE MY FUTURE HUSBAND(TAYLOR LAUTNER) AND I WILL SHARE THE LOVE YOU HAVE. LOL. OH BTW I'VE PROBABLY ALREADY HAD THE MOVIE SPOILT FOR ME SO I SHALL PUT THE SCENE IM MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO TMR! HOPE YOU ENJOY LOOKING AT IT :D

i leaned against the tree and allowed myself to slowly approach the ground. I sat down and lifted my knees, giving me something to lean my head upon. i blinked hard, trying to rid my eyes of the salt water that began to swim in them. "No," i whisphered, "i wont do this, i..i...w-wont." but nothing could stop me as the pool overfload from my eyes and fell down my face, leaving behind stains. i wiped at them vigorously, angry at myself for crying over such a matter. "s-s-stupid girl," i muttered at myself. "youre crying over such stupid things, so what if you never find love, s-s-so what?" but i couldnt answer my own question, and more tears, but this time tears of rage, streamed down my face falling to my shirt, staining it as sobs ripped from my chest. i sat that for what seemed like hours, and when i finally began to calm down, the darkness had fallen upon the woods where i had run to to hide, so that no one could find me in this state. i stood up, still shaking, and laid a hand against the tree to steady myself. "i was a fool," i whisphered to the darkness, "love, what a horrible four letter word, it only exist to hurt people and blind them of the reality of how painful the world can really be." and she walked away, deeper and deeper into the forest, finding a way to escape the world and no longer believing in the closest thing we have to magic - love.




dont give up. it'll find its way to us (: believe it :D I love you!